Time to see the Light

There is one little thing that is keeping this WWOOF experience from being a perfect 10. It stems from a small line in their WWOOF listing, the one that says they are a rather spiritual family, the one that I dismissed as indication of good church attendance. If you have a sincere belief in Krom and the ignition of Jupiter then for the sake of our continued friendship please stop reading.

Thursday night it`s just me, Ryan the American kid, and Pastor at the house. Now Pastor had already explained a bit of his religion to us a few days earlier, and it`s a little much. He showed us an email he had received from some divine being called Krom. As he read it I looked at the bottom of the screen, where it said page 3 of 87. Ryan of course was super interested, and I feel it was his ¨I want to learn more of this¨ that was the reason any of this happened.

I was planning to call some friends that night, I had reserved the computer with Ryan and was looking forward to it all day. An hour before calling, Pastor got us making some bread and an incredible blackberry pastry. (It`s worth noting that the pastry was really unforgettable, a thick crust with over an inch and a half of berries plastered on top, baked until hot.) Fine, fine, I thought, since we`d be done in time to eat and then I`d happily head over to Skype.

Twenty minutes before calling time, the food is on the table. Pastor places his religion`s Bible and another book of worship on the table: ¨let`s digest these too¨. He turns on a CD of some authentic wind chime music featuring religious chant and my phone plans begin to evaporate.

First there was reading of the book and verification that we understood each sentence. Then Pastor would chant some of the Hebrew text over and over and look to us to join in. Are you serious? I did my best uninterested mutter but it tapered off when he broke into a bellowing song. Ryan was pratically shouting along with him at a few points.

The religion, as best I understand it, hinges on the fact that Jupiter is going to be (or already has been?) ignited by a solar flare and turn into a second sun, dramatically altering all our computer and monetary systems on Earth. The book is written by a fellow named J.J. Hurtak, who in a quick internet search I can't find much information on. But it has a Christian basis with lots of Jewish elements and then the fun of alternate dimiensions and aliens. If my Spanish was up to a level that permitted being argumentative, I might say something to the claims that there are civilizations on Mars and that the government is covering up alien contact, but I just kind of stare blankly. As it is, I don`t want to jinx my mercaba, a body of light that will take me to the next dimension when everything goes to hell.

I snuck away to bed, more than a little weirded out. The next day we ate breakfast to a 30 minute special on the Mayan long-count calendar doomsday. The most tongue-and-cheek I could muster was loading up a trailer for the apocalyptic upcoming blockbuster of the same subject called 2012. We washed that down with some pictures of the alternate dimensions and some crop circles from around the world.

Say what you will about keeping an open mind and embracing cultural differences. This was a step a little too far into the creepy, and I laugh about it, though at the expense of those who believe. And why wasn't Pastor with his kids during all this time? Nevertheless, I endured quite the night and am deserving of sharing the story. A little cough and pretend sickness are my preparation for the next time this sort of thing comes up. I`ve also started to push Yahtzee on a nightly basis, as a way to entertain the group before bed without considering the end of the world. Until, let me just leave you with"Kodoish, Kodoish, Kodoish, Adonai Tsebayoth!"